[WANTED] Cursed Sticker Removal

Need someone to remove some cursed stickers from my mailbox.

The other day I left my house to get the mail, and noticed a sticker on the side saying “CTHULIST.ORG” and searching on it led me here. It’s pretty hard to type, really, I’m used to 4D keyboards but this place only allows 2D letters. Nonetheless, guess I’m fighting fire with fire, eh?

Anyway, the stickers seem to age whatever I try to remove them with. I tried scraping it off with my nails, now got 4 wrinkly fingers, one necrotic. My knife just turned to rust under it and blew off in the breeze. I’m expecting compensation off the admins for that, by the way; it wasn’t a cheap knife.

Are there any mages or scientists who may be able to help me get the sticker off my mailbox? Or even any sort of substances I can use? WD-70 isn’t cutting it.

Phone me at [REDACTED].