Category Archives: ancient artifacts

SEEKING!!! Recipe Book of Forgotten Eternities

Hi y’all, Looking for a recipe book that instructs on how to create universes from scratch. I’ve only found programming examples (NOT what I’m asking for, I’m not good with computers) or theological prayer books. BUT I will pay a good price because I want to get this done A S A P please! There’s

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SELLING ADJUSTABLE MONSTER TRAP

GREETINGS! I AM DESIGNATED HUNTER B3-6N-02P, SON OF RENOWNED MONSTER HUNTER Y6-0I-01P. THOUGH OLD AND OBSOLETE TO ME, HIS ALL-PURPOSE MONSTER TRAP MAY BE A GOOD FIT FOR ASPIRING AND AMATEUR MONSTER HUNTERS. IT HAS BEEN MAINTAINED EXCELLENTLY OVER THE YEARS, AND FUNCTIONS JUST AS WELL AS IT DID TWO CENTURIES AGO. IT IS CAPABLE

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Pre-universe Matchbox car, mint condition

Limited edition Elder God Chariot from the Matchbox Eternal series, pre-universe. You may not ever find something else like it, since as far as I know, all the other pre-universe ones have been recalled by Matchbox for anomalous effects. Statement from the company: “We did not make these. They don’t even exist and they never

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For Sale: Fortune-Telling Auto-Typewriter. Fair Condition, Answers Only in Haiku

You can have it for 25 credits in any interdimensional currency, demonic favors preferred (will throw in a ream of paper). It’s fairly functional and accurate but as the ad says, it’ll only answer questions in haiku-form. Here are some questions I asked it, for instance: Q: When and how will I die? A: 2024–

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Coronation Crown – hardly used

Some man-sized [REDACTED] came through my back door. He was awfully persuasive, and sold me a crown. If anyone would like to take it off my hands, it would be appreciated. He told me it extended your life by two minutes every time someone says “God Save the King/Queen!” (depending on if you’re male or

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