Mind controlling baby chicken for sale. CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP!

I’ve recently come into possession of a three-eyed chick, which I’m pretty sure was put in my garden as a prank from the Martians. Anyway, it CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP can take control of my mind for a few seconds at a time, but it doesn’t CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP know English, so it kind of just makes chick noises. It clearly understands how phonemes work, since it can CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP make me write its noises in onomatopoeias, but I’m no biologist, what do I know?

Anyway, it might get more powerful as it ages, you might be able to get its powers if you eat it, whatever. Nonetheless, I want CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP it gone. Any price, I’ll give it for free. Call me at [REDACTED], but only on a new moon – the chick’s third eye seems to close then and I get control over my body.


Minor god selling post-apocalyptic planet

Dominant race broke my world, that’s the long and short of it.

I’ve lost my deposit on it and insurance won’t cover me so my only option is to sell it for as much as I can get, you get what you see with this one.

I’m not even sure how they did it, I think they just nuked each other, only took a few hours and that’s my whole planet roasted.

If you’re looking to start a cockroach civilisation, that’s what I’d recommend to you. I’d do it myself but this whole thing has made me terribly depressed and I’m gonna take a breather from worldbuilding for a while and do a gap year.

There’s at least five places that escaped total annihilation, I’d recommend starting there if you’re looking to engineer a new race. Or you can bulldoze the plot and start again, I don’t care as long as I can recoup at least some of the cost.

I’m asking for half my soul expenditure, 2.2 billion Premium souls (animals were all on Free souls). I doubled up on some of them after a few centuries but I don’t think anyone noticed.

Please contact me ASAP on [ABDUCTED] or email at [REPEALED]